Pride and the Bad Rap

Pride has such a bad rap, doesn’t it?  In the Bible, the Torah, the Quran (and probably other religious texts), it’s all negative.  Don’t be proud, be humble.  Reading this, one could easily interpret that recognizing your own achievement – or being recognized for it – was a terrible thing.

Doesn’t that break down some of the joy of achievement?  I certainly don’t strive for achievement only for recognition – I enjoy the learning, the journey, the opportunities, and the results which may benefit others or myself.  But yes, I also enjoy the recognition.

In my experience and observation, confidence in yourself and your achievements is an area where we (as a North American society, anyways) haven’t really excelled in the past hundred years or so.  Yes, there are exceptions.  But I feel like we’ve been so overshadowed by the negativity of being proud that most of us never gave ourselves permission to be proud of anything.  Proud of others – our kids, our partner, a friend – maybe, but not of ourselves.

Yes, there are those exceptions – those people who seem so puffed up about everything about themselves that they’re only tolerable in small doses.  I wonder about them, though – is that real, or just their own protective façade?

Here’s my take on the subject:  If you work hard for/on/at something, and you achieve it, you should be proud of it.  Not in that “I’m the greatest person in the world” way which really isn’t good or kind, but in a way that invites celebration.  Celebrate your wins.  Be proud of them.  Whether your win is a new job or a promotion, the conquering of a fear with which you’ve struggled, a new connection, a goal that inspires you, an award for which you’ve striven, or something else, be proud.  After earning this or overcoming something – even if it’s just a fear that you thought was silly – you deserve to show this off a little.

Think about it.  How do YOU feel when someone you know achieves something great?  Perhaps a little bit envious, especially if it’s something you too want to achieve.  But I know that I feel excited and happy for that person as well.  You probably do too.  It’s fun to watch people succeed, and I believe this creates an important message:  they did it – so can I!  Seeing someone else’s win can be an affirmation that you too can do it. 

Whether your mountain is the same, or perhaps a different one, your attitude and effort will always be the top factors in your ability to achieve what you want.  And since you control those, you deserve to be proud when they provide a great result.

As with the rest of my posts, this does come from a personal place.  Today, at 8:30 in the morning, my doorbell rang.  My doorbell seldom rings (that’s good), and this is even less so in our current environment.  It certainly never rings at 8:30 in the morning on a day when I slept in a little.  This, however, was a worthwhile ring of the doorbell.  My honey signed for a box, which I just opened assuming it was another delivery.  It was – sort of.  It was THE delivery.  Ever since I conquered the initial “talking in front of people” fear which drove me to Toastmasters, this is the goal to which I have aspired.  There’s been lots of work, plenty of achievement, and definitely some challenges.  But I am proud of this.  I’ve earned this, and more than anything, I have pride in what this represents: my own achievements. 

Today’s lesson is super-simple (to say, at least).  Go on.  Be proud of what you’ve achieved.  Whether that was putting on pants today or trying a new recipe or stepping out of your comfort zone somewhere.  You’ve achieved something.  Be proud.